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I am a ray of sunshine - starting fires and causing cancer.

A jack of all asses.


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Mission Statement

To be the best Internet jackass I can be and provide customers with unparalleled service in a completely non-sexual way.


The content of this blog is a celebration of irreverence. Its purpose is to entertain, connect and serve as a forum for my ranting, grumbles and over-sharing. Opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect the opinions of my employer, parents, grandparents, civilized society, most animal species or myself when not menstruating. Quite frankly, they are the product of a deeply disturbed mind. In short, this blog is not for human consumption. If ingested, induce vomiting.


20 December 12

Was your ass forged by Sauron?



Because that shit looks precious.

‘I cannot understand the fiery letters,’ he said.

‘No, but I can,’ Gandalf answered. ‘The letters are Asslish, of an ancient mode, but the language is that of Sphinctor, which I shall not utter here. But in the common tongue this is what it says:’

“One butt to shake it all, one butt to grind them.

One butt to drop down low and to the dance floor bind them.”

I would read this.

Reblogged: itsnotanaddiction

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