Sometimes I wake up in a cold sweat...
May 2nd
Because every day is a sexy sex day, I give you…
...
May 1st
Listen
Song of the Day:
The Toy Dolls “Blue Suede Shoes”
Madness ensues. Glorious, goofy...
May 1st
Listen
PANDEMIC PANIC!
Also, I want bacon.
May 1st
Listen
Song of the Day:
Sweet “Ballroom Blitz”
Ooooooooooooooooh yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah!
Apr 30th
texburgher:
bliccy:
(via faneffingtastic)
I’m currently...
Apr 30th
Listen
Song of the Day:
Liam Lynch “United States of Whatever”
It really is one of those...
Apr 30th
It has to end sometime.
Apr 30th
GPOYRESPECTF - gratuitous picture of yourself R-E-S-P-E-C-T...
Apr 30th
I have no idea why I made this
I don’t even know when...
Apr 29th
I love anticlimactic comics.
Apr 29th
Listen
Song of the Day:
MC Chris “Fett’s Vett”
+12 dork points.
Apr 29th
Reliving the pain of my adolescent...
I give you my “Tweet 16“… *projectile vomits* I like the smell of my Sharpie fine...
Apr 29th
Have we done anything with "sween flu"...
clapifyoulikeme: mikemorrow: Sorry, I’ve been busy. Just tried to avoid catching it. OH SNAP. No,...
Apr 28th
Patience is a virtue
dvsjr: aimee-b-loved: dvsjr: When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with...
Apr 28th
secretdark:
via: every damn person on Tumblr.
What’re the...
Apr 28th
Patience is a virtue
dvsjr: When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, then you want the...
Apr 28th
Anti-choice Extremists Move to Block Gov....
Apr 28th
Oh, I see.
It’s okay guys. I found out that the source of my butthurt has nothing to do with videos. And...
Apr 27th
These reindeer games need more booze
Should I be butthurt because I wasn’t asked to be in the video made by people who were...
Apr 27th
Listen
Song of the Day:
Wreckless Eric “Whole Wide World”
Apr 26th
Listen
Song of the Day Runner-Up:
Scott Walker “30 Century Man”
Apr 26th
GPOYPF - Big Moosey, part deux
Just because I like to...
Apr 24th
GPOYPF - Big Moosey
Big Moosey wandered up one day. He was...
Apr 24th
Sexy Sex Thursday?
Me being felt up by my best friends on...
Apr 24th
The term "clammy" is sexy, right?
Mark: Oh, hey... I love you so very much and can't wait to hold your hand again. Just sayin'.Me: Aww! Well, just so you know, it's all hot and sweaty for you. That's a turn-on, right? Hot, sweaty hands? If you play your cards right, I may even have a hangnail with your name on it. How about THAT, Big Boy?
Mark: You dirty talker, you...
Me: Sh'yeah... I KNOW!
Mark: Get me all hot and bothered like that and we'll need to break out the Gold Bond.
Me: Now I'm hot and clammy in a different place!
Apr 23rd
Hair Stylist Keeps Armed Robber as Sex Slave
Apr 23rd
Listen
Song of the Day:
Fraggle Rock “30-Minute Work Week/Workin’, Workin’”
Wake...
Apr 23rd
On the film version of being repeatedly...
Dear Colin and Greg Strause, I would like the 102 minutes of my life back that I so foolishly wasted...
Apr 23rd
Oh 10,000 B.C., you really are that bad
Despite its near legendary status as a cinematic abortion, I watched 10,000 B.C. - twice! When...
Apr 23rd
Don’t worry your precious head
You worry too much. You worry that, on paper, you’re in the red – older, divorced, has two kids. You...
Apr 23rd
Listen
For Dig-the-Cat’s back:
Toy Dolls “Fiery Jack”
No need to thank me.
Apr 23rd
Ode to my boobies
Dear Tits, Sorry, do you like being called Tits? I don’t think I ever bothered to clarify...
Apr 23rd
11 extinct animals that have been...
Apr 22nd
Earth Day: Celebrating 39 years of...
Let me begin with saying that I think environmentalism, conservation and sustainability are good...
Apr 22nd
GPOYW
Somedays I feel like an old lady trying to look...
Apr 22nd
OH NO, @giromide! The horror… The horror.
Apr 22nd
GPOYW
This was from the drawing on myself phase I had a...
Apr 22nd
This is why my mommy made me stop playing with dolls.
Apr 22nd
AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Apr 22nd
alilbit:
(via chvnx)
aw, this is adorable. hahaha…
I...
Apr 22nd
This is not an "Oh shit, my biological...
I’m not anti-children. In fact, it’d be safe to say that I actually like kids. It’s just that my...
Apr 22nd
Listen
Song of the Day:
Placebo “Every You Every Me”
Sometimes I forget how much I like...
Apr 22nd
Random Oil Paintings of Barack Obama Nude on...
Apr 22nd
Apr 22nd
(via joshdutcher)
Horrible! XD
Apr 22nd
Listen
Song of the Day:
José González “Heartbeats”
Apr 21st
Anyone want to carpool to the pet store?
Apr 21st
A little something I made for my sister
She loves puppies...
Apr 21st
Listen
Stuck in My Head:
The Muppets “Mah Nà Mah Nà”
…And now it’s stuck in...
Apr 21st
Fuggin art
Mark and I were sitting on the steps of the Art Institute, sipping coffee and finishing our bagel,...
Apr 21st
No. 73: Art-themed cereals
Apart from the fact you’d point at every bowl-shaped piece of art and say, “Now that I...
Apr 20th
Listen
Song of the Day:
Her Space Holiday “Tech Romance”
Apr 20th
Wonderful banality
indefensible: This is a phrase that I think I invented. It describes the things in a relationship...
Apr 20th
adelamaide:
(via tmblg)
Apr 19th
Things I learned this weekend whilst...
My grandmother doesn’t want me to date an artsy man because she’s convinced that...
Apr 19th
And all that jazz
I’m not dead. I’d just been away for a few days. I was in Chicago. I’ve been thinking about going to...
Apr 18th
The answer train continues. Toot. Toot.
carlyjo answered: WHY HAVEN’T...
Apr 13th
Watch
Walk it out, Fosse.
This always makes me smile. Video of Gwen Verdon Fosse dancing synced to...
Apr 11th
First two answers
americanmailorderbride answered: ...
Apr 11th
Turning Good Friday into Great Friday
Mark: Shitdamhell! Looks like I have to sit through a prayer service in about 10 minutes. Good Friday, my ass!Me: Aww... Try taking off your pants. See if that changes their minds.
Mark: I'm thinking the bar ought to be one of the stations of the cross. Just sayin'.
Me: Ask for extra Communion wine. Or perhaps a Communion shot.
Mark: Body (of Christ) shots?
Me: BWAHAHA! And THIS is why I adore you.
Apr 11th
Another important question
I know the flavor only lasted for 45 seconds and the press-on tattoos on the wrapper never quite...
Apr 10th
Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition
Okay, the weekend is coming up. Which means I’ll have spare sparingly sober time to address...
Apr 10th
This is Elton. He is a silver egyptian mau. One day he will...
Apr 10th
This is Bocephus, he is an applehead siamese. One day he...
Apr 10th
Bunny Picture!
From when I fancied myself an artist. Such a...
Apr 9th
GPOYW - Old School edition
So, this picture is a few years...
Apr 9th
Philosophizing on a sunny afternoon
One question that I find myself asking more and more is: Why am I still here? I find that to be much...
Apr 8th
Australia, and my irrational fear of it
After reading @indefensible’s post on Australia, it sounds like a lovely place with a history...
Apr 8th
The Spanish Inquisition meme
I thought about participating in the “Ask me questions and I’ll reply” meme. But...
Apr 8th
“Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no...”
— Mark Twain, writer, wit, never...
— Mark Twain, writer, wit, never...
Apr 8th
Watch
Kids who do cool shit better than I can ever dream of doing is the reason why I’m Pro-Choice
...
Apr 8th
My calling
I’ve begun to entertain the idea of switching career paths. Advertising is all very well and fine,...
Apr 8th
Listen
Song of the Day:
M.I.A. “10 Dollar”
Because nothing says “Fuck you, it’s...
Apr 8th
Watch
Natalie Portman’s Shaved Head “Sophisticated Side Ponytail”
Thanks to Mark for...
Apr 7th
Aimee’s celebrity crush
Streetcar Named Desire-era...
Apr 7th
daniellei:
essdogg:
(via badarama)
I would like to give...
Apr 7th
Listen
Song of the Day:
Beirut “The Shrew”
Yes, I bump this in my car. Because I can’t...
Apr 7th
Watch
daniellei:
thedailywhat:
Early Bird Special: “Waiting for Elmo”.
A play so modern and so...
Apr 6th
It’s symbiosis, man. Symbiosis.
Apr 5th
A Bonusland version of Genesis 38.
me: Not to mention, God TOLD Onan to impregnate the bitch.whlteXbread: Wow, how do I not remember who Onan was?
me: OK, here's the story.
Onan was a dude, he had a brother, his brother had a wife.
God didn't like the brother, so he killed him. Said he was evil and shit.
So then God said to Onan, go fuck this broad. Your dead brother's wife. We need more babies because there's only like 23 people in the world so far.
whlteXbread: (who was Onan the son/relative of?)
me: The son of Judah and Shua.
So, Onan banged his used-to-be-sister-in-law-but-now-she's-a-widow, but he felt bad about it so he pulled out.
Or, "spilled his seed on the ground." as Moses called it.
whlteXbread: And then Onan got dead?
me: So yeah. God didn't like Onan's birth control method, especially when God wanted a Godson, so he killed Onan.
Technically the first Skeet ever.
Or at least the first documented one.
whlteXbread: right. i love this: "so then God said to Onan, go fuck this broad."
Apr 3rd
Listen
Song of the Day:
N.A.S.A. “Money (featuring David Byrne, Chuck D, Seu Jorge, Ras Congo, and...
Apr 3rd
The Internet would be a much better place if my high school...
Apr 3rd
Listen
Song of the Day:
Santigold “L.E.S. Artistes”
Apr 2nd
GPOYSGW: Gratuitous Photo of Yourself Showing Gratitude...
Apr 2nd